Friday, February 1, 2008

The Mommy Speaks...

What does one say, do, feel when told that your daughter, your baby, your first child has a terminal disease? How do you keep moving when the world seems to spin out of control and your shoes are made of cement? How can you possibly believe that anyone in the world could have ever felt how you feel now or gone through such a terrifying ordeal? These are the things that whirl around in my head during my every waking moment and most of the moments that I should be sleeping.

Now I know the answer. You just do. You just go. You just move.

In my case, I was lucky enough to have a big push in the form of my 2 bossy, overeducated, and generally AMAZING older siblings. I know where to go, and I mostly know what to do. I have the opportunity to fight for my daughter's life and thats exactly what I intend to do. How fortunate am I to have a loving and supportive husband to join me in my efforts to thwart this enemy we call Hurlers. And with our army of family and friends we will go to the greatest of lengths for our Gracie.

Nothing about my journey with Gracie has been very easy, from conception it seems that we have dealt with one battle after another, but this bumpy journey has been filled with all the love and happiness that a mother could wish for. And as far as I am concerned, its not going to stop now.

With the help of the folks at the University of Minnesota, I intend to share a long lifetime of love and snuggles and smiles with my precious baby girl. My Gracie is a fighter, and so is her mom. So we will leave for the frozen north next week with fear, but mostly with hope that we can give our daughter the best life possible. That is what being a mother is all about.

5 comments:

Ayekah said...

Your beautiful words are filled with love and indeed, hope. Know that you are held in thought and prayer unceasingly. And surrounded by so many who love and care for all of you. I agree with the Bro on the Hurlers support site. Minnesota in winter, pack those long johns, egad!!
I leave you in peace and hope.

*Adriann* said...

I love you Sarah! I'm here every step of the way

Kelsey said...

Sarah you words brought tears to my eyes. You are such a great mommy to Gracie. Have a very safe journey to the north. Thinking and Praying for Gracie every day.

Amanda said...

Sarah, I've kept you all in my prayers every night. I wish you nothing but strength and hope for the days to come. You are an inspiration to all of us.

Swansong said...

Jimmy just linked me to your family blog a few minutes ago and I am reading this post with a wmile on my face and tears in my eyes! Your such a loving wonderful mommy to your daughter and while this post was written months ago I am sure that you would write it the same way right now this second. I am reading thru your blog slowly today while at work so I am sure I will comment more. I've know Jimmy (actually I think you call him something else) for many years and my heart goes out for you all.